One of these things is not like the other.

Look: I know wrestling is fake. I've known it since I was 8 years-old and realized that, no, that undead man was not actually buried alive on worldwide TV and then hit with a bolt of magic lightning. There's a suspension of disbelief involved with the art of pro wrestling that's part of the fun. However, I refuse to accept or believe that part-timer Logan Paul and herculean beastman and Intercontinental Champion GUNTHER have the same WWE 2K24 rating.

WWE is rolling out the overall skill ratings for this year's game on social media. Much like football fans who get too worked up over Madden overall ratings, wrestling fans also get a bit too excited. After all, In reality, a high skill rating is a lot like winning an Oscar. It's not the best, but the thing that best represents the industry as a whole.

And I think that's why I'm even more salty about the WWE 2K24 ratings of Logan "I'm sorry about desecrating the famed japanese 'Suicide Forest'" Paul and GUNTHER, one of the greatest professional wrestlers of the last decade.

WWE 2K24 ratings for Logan Paul, GUNTHER, more

WRESTLER
BRAND
RATING
Rhea RipleyRaw96
Cody RhodesRaw93
Logan PaulSmackDown90
GuntherRaw90
Jey UsoRaw90
Drew McIntyreRaw89
Finn BalorRaw87
Kevin OwensSmackDown86
Solo SikoaSmackDown86
Damian PriestRaw86
Jimmy UsoSmackDown84
Dominik MysterioRaw83
The MizRaw81
Chad GableRaw80
Tiffany StrattonSmackDown79
Zelina VegaSmackDown74
Alba FyreSmackDown74
Johnny GarganoRaw74
OtisRaw74
JD McDonaghRaw71
The WWE 2K24 Skill ratings revealed so far.

I really am trying my best to not put too much stock in WWE 2K24 ratings. After all, it's all just made up numbers for a made up sport. A television show where a guy with a bad neck tattoo is going to fight The Rock's cousin for a fashion accessory. It's all in fun! Right? Why am I not having fun? Why does the mere thought of Logan Paul and Gunther having the same WWE 2K24 rating mald me in such a way?

It might be that I have to begrudgingly accept that, despite having a strong hatred of Cleveland's own (by way now of Puerto Rico), Logan Paul is pretty good at the whole wrestling thing. I hate to admit that, really. However, in his short wrestling career he's elevated himself from celebrity appearance to actual wrestler and United States Champion.

The WWE popularity contest

HOWEVER, that is where the acknowledgement ends. In a bubble? Fine, I accept Logan Paul is athletic and smarmy and that usually helps one be a good pro wrestler. But I refuse to accept the notion that GUNTHER, the most dominant champion in WWE outside of Roman Reigns, has the same WWE 2K24 ratings as Logan Paul. No. That is not reality. More to the point, putting GUNTHER--a man so overbearingly powerful that his finisher is just a basic powerbomb--at anything other than a 99 feels false.

But, like I said: Popularity contest. Fine. I can accept it, but I don't have to like it. This is neither the first nor last time that professional wrestling will ask me to believe something completely insane.

After all, my favorite wrestler of all time is a man who, at one point, thought he was three dudes. And then, all three of those dudes wrestled in the same match. Man, wrestling is great. And terrible.

Stay tuned to esports.gg for esports news and WWE 2K24 information.